


you and me, we’re a day drink

by ohallows



Category: Rusty Quill Gaming (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canon Asexual Character, Confessions, Introspection, M/M, Non-Linear Narrative, alt episode 65
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-19
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:48:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23741071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohallows/pseuds/ohallows
Summary: The room is nearly pitch black, lit only by the light of the moon filtering in through the curtains, when Zolf realises he can’t stay any longer. He’s - he’s already stayed longer than he should have, but… he’s always been weak, and when Hamid asked him to stay, eyes wide and pleading and desperate, Zolf didn’t know how to refuse. And then one thing had led to another and there’d been a whole conversation, and, well. Now Hamid’s asleep in Zolf’s arms, and Zolf is laying awake and staring up at the ceiling, trying to make this moment last for as long as he can.
Relationships: Hamid Saleh Haroun al-Tahan/Zolf Smith
Comments: 8
Kudos: 64





	you and me, we’re a day drink

**Author's Note:**

> the two vibes for this fic are:  
> \- the gold, by manchester orchestra (also the title)  
> \- everything all at once (live), by syml
> 
> alt titles (also from the gold) was ‘so lose your faith in me’ or ‘you believed you love me’

The room is nearly pitch black, lit only by the light of the moon filtering in through the curtains, when Zolf realises he can’t stay any longer. He’s - he’s already stayed longer than he should have, but… he’s always been weak, and when Hamid asked him to _stay_ , eyes wide and pleading and desperate, Zolf didn’t know how to refuse. And then one thing had led to _another_ and there’d been a whole _conversation,_ and, well. 

Now Hamid’s asleep in Zolf’s arms, and Zolf is laying awake and staring up at the ceiling, trying to make this moment last for as long as he can. He knows it won’t be able to go on forever, as much as he wishes it could. Still, he’s maybe pushing it a bit longer than he should, not if he wants to make it back to the docks before the ship departs. 

He looks down at Hamid, sleeping peacefully and with no idea of what’s running through his mind, and wishes that he could stay. Wishes that he were a different dwarf, at a different time, in a different place. Still with Hamid, of course, but this… their paths crossed for a moment, but Zolf knows that this was never meant to stay. Accepts it, now, even if his heart feels like it’s breaking every time he sinks further into his resolve to leave. 

_The distillery didn’t have the best alcohol Zolf had ever had, but he didn’t speak Czech and there was no sense in leaving to find somewhere else when here would do just fine. Plus, Hamid had already found him, and Zolf was petty but not petty enough to up and go when Hamid was standing there, looking upset. They’d argued - that had been happening a lot, recently - and then Sasha had appeared, and then Zolf had tried to leave, which Hamid wasn’t having any of._

_“Hamid,” Zolf said, frustrated beyond belief and exhausted beyond measure. Maybe that’s why he was so…vulnerable, so candid, when normally he’d rather die than have an emotional discussion about how he felt. “I’m a liability. I’m tired, I’m done. I’m hanging on by a thread, I don’t… this isn’t going to change. You get that, right?”_

_Hamid was… well, Hamid was more stubborn than even Zolf was, sometimes, so he set his jaw, determined. “I just think -“_

_Zolf looked at Sasha over Hamid’s shoulders as he spoke, who was tucked back into the shadows, watching this play out with an unhappy look on her face. He - gods, it was just this morning that she found out there was_ something _going on with her, some mysterious bleeding neither of them have the answer for, and probably won’t without a proper examination._

_“What do you think, Sasha?” Zolf asked, completely interrupting Hamid, and it seemed like Sasha almost melted further back into the shadows at the question._

_“...I already said what I think,” Sasha said, haltingly. “Don’t think anyone should be forced to stay anywhere. Not if they’re unhappy. This isn’t - this isn’t a prison.” The last bit was muttered, some bitterness rising up from somewhere Zolf didn’t know, but he just gestured at her._

_“See? Hamid, just let me_ go. _I’m not going to change my mind,” he said, but Hamid just shook his head, taking another step toward Zolf._

_“Let’s all just… stay for the night. We don’t have to go look for Bertie, I don’t - I’m sure he can’t get into that much trouble,” Hamid said, although he didn’t sound convinced by his own words. “Just… please. Let’s all sleep on it, and then we can discuss it in the morning when it’s not all fresh. Okay?”_

_Zolf stared at him, opening his mouth._

_“Please,” Hamid said again, cutting him off, and his face may have been set into his standard stubborn look, but Zolf could tell that underneath there are cracks. “If you want to still leave tomorrow, that’s fine, and I won’t argue anymore, just… just sleep on it.”_

_It was a standoff; Zolf’s standoffishness and self-hatred coming up against Hamid’s determination and desire to keep them all together, and in the end Hamid won._

_“Fine,” he finally said, short and irritated, trying not to let the relieved smile on Hamid’s face make his chest feel all… warm. He’d stay., against all his judgement, in a city he knew next to nothing about, all because Hamid had asked for one more day. Zolf thought it was a bad idea, didn’t think that this would accomplish anything, but Hamid was good at being persuasive and Zolf was bad at saying no, sometimes._

_They went on down the street, led by Sasha as she tried to find a hotel in an unfamiliar city, and then stopped in front of a decent-looking place._

_Hamid had gone up to the counter before either of them could get there (although, to be fair, Sasha wasn’t trying too hard) and bought two rooms, one single and one double. He handed the single room key to Sasha and then set off to the other room with a determined set to his jaw. Zolf hadn’t said anything in protest, just exchanged a confused and irritated look with Sasha._

_Fine. Hamid wanted to talk? Fine. Zolf didn’t have anything more to say, nothing else to bring to the table, so Hamid was going to have to deal with the silence all night._

Hamid breathes against Zolf’s collarbone, little snores coming from him as he sleeps. His arm is slung across Zolf’s chest, wrapping around him (as much as he can), and he’s tucked tightly into his side, Zolf’s arm under him. His head rests on Zolf’s shoulder, hair brushing against his neck. He fell asleep a while ago, but Zolf just… hasn’t been able to. Too locked in his own head, unable

to turn off the thoughts swirling around his brain.

So instead of thinking, he tilts his head, glancing down at Hamid, and just… looks at him for a moment, eyes tracing the lines of his face. He looks… softer, when he’s asleep. It’s something Zolf really hasn’t had the chance to notice, to appreciate before. There’s none of the worry, none of the anxiety, and Zolf can feel a lump slowly forming in his throat as he watches him. It hasn’t been long, not at all, but Zolf hadn’t really realised how much he was going to miss him until this moment. How much he was going to miss them both. 

He just - he hadn’t realised how attached he’d gotten, somehow? But it doesn’t… in the end it doesn’t really _matter_ , not when Zolf isn’t going to change his mind. He can’t… he can’t _live_ like this anymore, can’t keep waiting for the other shoe to fall again (and again and again and again until there’s _nothing_ of him left). Gods forbid he stays and then snaps when they’re in the middle of a battle, just completely breaks. 

The clock in the corner of the room chimes quietly, signalling the passage of another hour, and Zolf sets his jaw, mind made up. He’s stretched this out for as long as he can, but there’s no more time left for him to sit here and wish. 

He’ll need to be careful; he doesn’t want Hamid waking up while Zolf is taking the coward’s way out. He extricates his arm from under Hamid, carefully rolling Hamid off of him, and slips off the bed, doing his best to move the bed as little as possible. Hamid doesn’t wake up, just shuffled around a bit. Zolf moves the pillow slightly, the one he’d been using, and Hamid snatches it up, arms wrapping around it as he lets out a content sigh.

Zolf breathes out, relieved, and silently pads over to the cupboard; being quiet is a lot easier now that he has two working… limbs, he supposes, is the correct word. He doesn’t have much to pack, but he still pauses as he makes it there, glancing back toward Hamid laying in the small beam of moonlight peeking in through the window.

_Zolf’s prediction of Hamid wanting to get him alone so that they could speak was right on the money. Hamid didn’t say anything as they headed up the stairs to the room, but the second they reached the landing he started in._

_“We need to_ talk _about this, Zolf,” Hamid said, closing the door behind him._

_“Talk about what? I made my decision.”_

_“Without_ speaking _to any of us!” Hamid argued, looking upset._

 _“That’s because it’s_ my _decision,” Zolf retorted, and Hamid huffed out an irritated breath.“I can’t_ stay, _Hamid!”_

 _“Why do you want to leave m-_ us _so badly?” Hamid finally cried out, throwing his hands to the side in frustration._

 _“Why do you want me to_ stay _so badly?” Zolf yelled in return, sure that half the hallway would be able to hear it, but Hamid didn’t flinch, just taking another step into his space._

_“I asked you first,” Hamid said, and Zolf rolled his eyes._

_“Oh, very mature,” he said, acid lacing every word even as he feels the fight draining out of his body._

_“You’re one to talk,” Hamid retorted, crossing his arms as he glared up at Zolf, refusing to back down. “Why won’t you just tell -“_

_“By the_ gods, _Hamid! I don’t_ want _to leave!” Zolf yelled. “This isn’t about what I want, it’s about what I have to do, yeah? I’m going to_ break _if I keep on going like this, Hamid.”_

 _“Then let us_ help,” _Hamid said, and Zolf just stared at him before shaking his head and sitting down on the bed. This - Hamid was sweet to try, of course, but no one else was going to be able to beat back the demons in Zolf’s brain._

_“You can’t,” he whispered and sat down heavy on the bed. He rested his head in his hands, heel of his palms digging into his eyes._

_“Why?” Hamid asked, pushing the subject like he always did, challenging Zolf’s own motivations, and Zolf stared up at him through his fingers._

_“You just can’t.”_

_“Because it’s something no one can help, or because you won’t let us?” Hamid asked, giving Zolf half a sad smile. Zolf didn’t know how to respond to that, because Hamid wasn’t completely off the mark on that one, but like hell he was going to tell Hamid he was right. He thought Hamid knew, anyway, by the way he looked at Zolf._

_They both fell into silence after that, the fight gone, spent from both of their bodies, and Hamid wrapped an arm around his chest as he stood there._

_“Stay until tomorrow. Please,” Hamid said eventually, sitting down next to him on the bed. “Let’s just - I promise I won’t try and change your mind anymore, I just… me, you, and Sasha can discuss it tomorrow, and if you still want to leave, you can. I won’t - I won’t stop you.”_

_“...Fine,” he responded, short, but if Hamid could hear the tension underlying it, the fragility running through his voice, he didn’t say anything. “Now why do you want me to stay so badly._

_Hamid tensed next to him on the bed, knuckles white as his hands clenched into fists._

_“Because you’re my friend, Zolf,” he said, quiet, and Zolf shook his head._

_“Yeah, maybe, but -“ he bit his lip. “Back there in the inn, you - you said that I was one of the only things you believed in. Hell of a lot of a thing to put on a friendship.”_

_Hamid stood, anxious energy clearly thrumming through his veins, and started pacing back and forth in the small room. “I just -“_

_“Spit it out, Hamid,” Zolf said, but it’s not_ angry _, nor upset, just…_ confused.

_“Because I - I -“ Hamid stuttered, and looked around the room, as though trying to check as though there was no one else in there with them. “I care about you. More - I care about Sasha and Bertie too, I do, but… I don’t know, it’s - it’s different, with you. I - I care about you a lot, Zolf,” he admitted, and Zolf blinked once, twice, before shaking his head._

_“You shouldn’t,” he muttered, glancing off to the side. Suddenly, Hamid was in his space, a soft but firm hand on his chin as he turned Zolf to look at him._

_“You can’t make that decision for me,” Hamid said, smooth and strong, and Zolf just looked at him, unable to speak. “I care about_ you, _Zolf, whether you -“ he trailed off at that, seeming unsure all of a sudden, and took a deep breath. “Whether you want me to or not.”_

_Zolf felt frozen in time, frozen in the confession, lost in the hopeful spark slowly igniting in Hamid’s eyes when Zolf didn’t immediately push him away. How could he, when Hamid was standing there, looking at him like he hung the moon, as though Zolf wasn’t a failed excuse for a soldier or a pirate or a leader?_

_He pulled Hamid closer to him until Hamid was standing in between his legs, foreheads nearly pressed together, and looked at him. “Do you mean that?” he breathed out, no louder than a whisper, and instead of answering, Hamid leaned in._

The rucksack is hidden somewhere under the bed, but Zolf summons it to him with a quick spell and lays it out on the table. He doesn’t have much - the trident is gone, lost to the depths of some hellish ravine, his armor is left behind, forgotten. All he _really_ has are some knicknacks he picked up, potions, a few old letters from his brother, the driftwood dolphin that he’s half-tempted to rip off his neck and leave in the gutter outside, and the ring on his finger. He stares at the ring for a moment, half-wondering if he should leave it behind. It doesn’t represent what he thought, doesn’t mean what he wanted it to, but it was still _Feryn’s,_ one of the last things of his he has left. Zolf curls his hand with the ring into a fist and presses it to his chest.

It’ll stay with him at least a little longer.

He pulls out a few of the potions. They seem… unnecessary now. He’s not planning on any more grand adventures, not really, so he places them down gently on the table next to one of Hamid’s own bags. There. A gift. They’ll all need them more than Zolf will, anyway.

_Kissing Hamid was like… okay, Zolf had spent most of his life getting used to the cold breeze coming off of the sea, steadying himself against the chill, and he had never thought about what fire might feel like. How it would feel to press against a furnace, to feel it blistering just below the surface. Kissing Hamid was like that. His lips burned where they slid against Zolf’s, gasps breathed out against his, hands an inferno where they twisted their way through Zolf’s hair, tugging gently._

_Hamid is sat atop him, now, legs straddling Zolf’s lap as he pushes closer, as Zolf_ pulls _him closer. Hamid’s… being more gentle than Zolf expected, even as his arms wrap around his neck. It was comfortable, the soft back-and-forth as Hamid tilted his head and ran his fingers through Zolf’s hair._

_Hamid got closer, crowding up until their chests were pressed together, and a small sliver of panic shot its way across Zolf’s mind in the space between where their lips met._

_“Hamid, wait,” Zolf said, pushing Hamid back gently as he tried to catch his breath. “I don’t.. want…_ that. _”_

_Hamid tilted his head at him, looking confused. “Don’t want what?”_

_Zolf sighed, because this was going to be the moment where Hamid did what everyone else had always done, and it was going to be a whole_ thing _, which was the absolute last thing Zolf wanted, but. Well. Nothing left for it. “Sex, I mean. It’s - I’m not a fan. Never have been.”_

_Hamid stared at him for a second longer, and then it was like something clicked in his head, and his mouth opened and closed as he tried to find the words. Zolf leaned back slightly, crossing his arms over his chest, and waited for the inevitable._

_“Oh,” Hamid said eventually. “Oh! Zolf, no. I - that’s really not what this was. I didn’t - expect anything, I mean, I just… I liked kissing you?” he finished lamely, and Zolf blinked for a second. “I - I didn’t realise you - I’m sorry, I should have asked, I -“_

_Zolf caught his hands, flailing in the air uselessly, with his own, and that simple motion cut Hamid off more effectively than any words would have. “That’s - the kissing was fine, er. I - I enjoyed it, really, it’s just. Not much. Not much interest in more, yeah?”_

_Hamid bit his lip, and then leaned forward to press a kiss to Zolf’s cheek. “Zolf, I - I’m not going to push you into anything you’re uncomfortable with, I - honestly, I wasn’t - I was happy with just kissing as well.”_

_Zolf wasn’t… completely sure what to do with that. At least, not beyond pulling Hamid back into his arms, Hamid slightly taller than him as he sits on the bed._

_“Okay,” Zolf said, and pulled Hamid’s hand up to his mouth, kissing his palm. “Good. Same page, and all.”_

_Hamid doesn’t move his hand far, cupping Zolf’s cheek and stroking his thumb across Zolf’s cheekbone as Zolf’s hand covered his._

_“So… this is okay? Just this?” Hamid asked, and it sounded slightly awkward but so, so earnest in his voice, and Zolf was helpless to do anything but pull him closer, heart beat a staccato pulse in his chest._

_“Yes,” Zolf breathed, and Hamid gave him a bright smile, leaning in so his forehead pressed against his. “Yes.”_

Fuck.

Zolf wipes at the corner of his eyes, swallowing around the lump in his throat as he stares down at the rucksack. He resolutely doesn’t look back at the bed again, and instead focuses on finishing this menial task so that he can finally leave and… and… 

He’d _promised_ Hamid he wouldn’t leave. 

He’d promised a lot of people a lot of things, over the years.

One day people will stop having faith in him. Hamid sure will. 

He grabs a few things that ended up scattered around the room when it fell, and starts putting them back methodically, rummaging around in it to make more space. His hand brushes against something softer than anything he’s ever owned, and he pauses, picking up a small handkerchief that Hamid had given him after the catacombs, when Zolf had woken up screaming and crying from the phantom pain in his legs. Hamid had come running in without knocking and Zolf had snapped at him and Hamid hadn’t _cared_ and… 

It was the first time after Paris, after _everything_ , when he hadn’t felt alone. Having Hamid there, holding Zolf’s hand in his own as he dabbed the frustrated tears away from Zolf’s face, speaking so _softly._

Zolf curses under his breath as he feels the pressure building behind his eyes, and shakes his head to clear it. It won’t do to get bogged down in memories, not when he needs to focus on leaving. 

He knows he shouldn’t keep the handkerchief. It - it wasn’t a gift, it was temporary, just like Zolf, and he should give it back to Hamid. It was never his to keep in the first place. The fabric is so delicate, so… fancy, it doesn’t belong in Zolf’s life. Still, he permits himself some small sentimentality, pressing a gentle kiss to the edge, taking a last inhale of the cologne Hamid favors. 

_It was late, and Zolf was tired after… everything from the trip. They had to stop kissing eventually, even though Zolf wanted to cling to it for as long as he could. Memorize the way Hamid felt against him, memorize the taste of his mouth, memorize the feel of Hamid’s hands pressing against his face, memorize the way his own heart fluttered every time Hamid leaned back in. But time wasn’t endless, and they found themselves laying down together in Zolf’s bed, curled up under the covers. Zolf’s arm was stretched out under Hamid, who had rested his head on Zolf’s shoulder, arm laying across his abdomen._

_“Mm,” Hamid murmured sleepily, cuddling up closer to Zolf in the bed. “You’re warm.”_

_Zolf laughed, quietly. “Think that’s you,” he teased, because Hamid was like a little furnace, resting on top of him. “...Comfy?”_

_“Yes,” Hamid said, and then propped his head up on Zolf’s chest, staring at him._

_“Er - something on my face?” Zolf asked, hand coming up and awkwardly brushing against his cheek. Hamid laughed, and reached up, brushing his finger against his lips. Zolf could feel the brush of magic sweep against them, and quirked his eyebrow at Hamid._

_“Lipstick,” Hamid explained, and Zolf nodded in understanding. “I got it all though.”_

_“Cheers,” Zolf said, and Hamid continued to look at him, thumb brushing against his cheekbone as a soft smile played across his face. If Zolf didn’t think about anything else, he could pretend that this wasn’t the last time he’d get to have this._

_“Penny for your thoughts?” he whispered instead, and Hamid’s thumb paused as the smile dropped from his face._

_“I think -“ Hamid started, biting his lip. “Nevermind, it’s - I’m just being silly.” Zolf didn’t say anything - sometimes Hamid just needed to think through what he wanted to say before saying it. Had to rationalise it to himself in his head, twist it into a way that made sense before he could verbalise it._

_“I think I might be falling for you,” Hamid said, no louder than a whisper, and his fingers traced the shape of Zolf’s face as he glanced up at him through his eyelashes. “I know it hasn’t been long, and I don’t expect you to -“_

_Zolf reached out himself, cutting Hamid off as he pulled him into another kiss. It was soft, and sweet, and to Zolf, it felt like a goodbye._

He grabs a piece of paper from the desk and stares down at it, pen in hand. There - he needs to _write_ something, he can’t just slink off under cover of night after confessing -. After making Hamid think… _gods_ , Zolf is an arse. He promised not to leave, promised to stay until tomorrow, but Zolf knows if he stays then Hamid will keep _asking_ him to stay, regardless of what he said, and Zolf will continue making excuses. 

_Hamid,_

~~_I’m sorry I wasn’t_ ~~

~~_This was never meant_ ~~

~~_I think I might be falling for you too, and_ ~~

~~_I want to stay, but I know I’m_ ~~

~~_I had to go_ ~~

_I’m sorry._

He crosses all of it off, except the last line, pen leaving little rips in the paper from how hard he scribbles, and then he quietly tears the paper off, slipping it into his pocket. He’s never been one for emotional goodbyes, written or otherwise, and giving Hamid a clean break without any expectation is the kindest thing he can do after disappearing. 

He leaves it simple, in the end. No sweeping confessions, no explanations. Hamid deserves one, _gods,_ he deserves one, but Zolf’s never been good with words at the best of the times, and he’s even worse with goodbyes. 

He writes the bank account information under it, along with instructions for how to transfer the contract into Hamid’s name. There’s no need to sign it; Hamid will know exactly who it’s from the second he sees it. This should be everything - Zolf’s not planning on making a return trip anytime soon, and Hamid and Sasha won’t have any idea how to contact him once he’s gone. He might be sneaking away, but he won’t leave them high and dry. Maybe - maybe one day he’ll be able to come back, but there’s so much shite swirling through his head that that day seems to be a long ways away. 

Zolf looks outside, toward the shipyard, and his getaway is still there. Captain Amelia hasn’t left yet. He can see her ship in the yard, but from what she’d said earlier, they should be setting out in the morning. Heading off, back to Paris, maybe, on to somewhere new, Zolf doesn’t know. 

He’s going to be on the ship, regardless. Harlequins help Harlequins. Em could use another crewmember, and Zolf could use something to… just something. 

He left home like this, too. Slunk away in the dead of night the day after Feryn’s funeral, before his parents woke, and left nothing behind but a note and broken memories. Zolf always runs, always disappears in the night, because clean breaks are easier than tearful goodbyes. 

In a moment of weakness, or stupidity, or maybe even _hope,_ Zolf walks back over to the bed and brushes a curl away from Hamid’s forehead. He leans down, lips a millimetre from his skin, and doesn’t let him second-guess himself before pressing a gentle kiss to Hamid’s temple. 

A goodbye. 

He pauses in the doorway, and memorizes… everything he can. It’s not enough time, never will be enough time, but at least he has this memory forever. The door closes quietly behind him, and Zolf wraps his hand around the strap of his rucksack, taking a deep, shuddering breath as he walks away down the dim hallway. 

He makes it to the shipyard just before dawn breaks, wheezing from how quickly he moved to get there. It’s not long before he finds the ship he’s looking for, and the particular captain who won’t ask too many questions about why he’s back so soon. Some of the crew call up when they notice him coming, and then Captain Amelia shows up, peering over the side of the ship. She looks curious, and maybe a little skeptical, but doesn’t ask him to explain what he’s doing there. He supposes it’s clear enough, what with the bag slung over his shoulder.

“You sure about this, Zolf?” Em calls when he steps onto the gangplank, and if she notices the redness in his eyes, the way his hands are slightly shaking, she doesn’t comment on it. Her eyes are sharp though, so he doubts it gets past her.

“Not really,” Zolf admits, staring up at her as she watches him, evaluating. She doesn’t say anything for a minute, but then sighs, and steps aside. 

“Well, if you’re coming, then get on. We’re setting off soon. Can drop you off along the way, anywhere you’d like. Got an idea of where you’re heading?”

Zolf steps up onto the deck, and shrugs. “Happy to go wherever you’re heading, Captain.”

Em doesn’t look completely convinced, and her eyes flick to his ring before she shrugs, turning off and walking briskly toward the aft, calling orders as she goes. He’s sure that he’ll have to answer to her later, but for now, she’s giving him space, and he’s thankful for that. 

The crew starts to get busy a few moments later, untying the ship from the aero port docks and pulling up the gangplank. They set off in the early morning light, and Zolf can’t help himself; he makes his way to the back of the ship and stares at Prague as it fades away in the distance, behind cover of fog. Sometime soon, Hamid will be waking up to an empty bed, with no sign of Zolf apart from a shitty note, a handkerchief, and a few potions that he left behind. He’s going to be angry and betrayed; Zolf can see it on his face, even now. Sasha… gods, _Sasha._ She’ll… she’ll be okay, in the end. He thinks she understands it more than Hamid, understands how it feels to have the walls closing in all around you and need to escape, even when you’re with people who you care about. Who care about you. 

But Zolf’s made his decision, and this far out, he isn’t able to change it, even if he wanted to. He slides down the wooden wall of the ship and feels his stomach roll, but whether from airsickness or guilt or an awful mix of the two, he isn’t sure. Prague disappears behind him, and Zolf stares out at the horizon, arms wrapped around his knees as they pull off into the sunrise. 

**Author's Note:**

> so i’m just. read a sad webcomic. listened to a sad song. needed to write this and make myself cry. this is my fave angst trope btw. sometimes you just need to write those “we realised how much we cared about each other at the worst time possible”
> 
> i keep doing this thing where i make them fight and then have to figure out how to make them *not* be fighting god it’s just. the dynamic!! anyways once again i’m not sure how i feel abt most of this i just needed the idea out of my system


End file.
